we are really very sorry, ‘coz we won’t be able to trust you henceforth, due to some of the bad apples present in your tribe.
I had put this up as a status on the ‘facebook’ and as a tweet on the ‘Twitter’, yesterday, without realizing what I was calling for. To those who haven’t figured it out yet, this was pertaining to the recent gang-rape case in Delhi. Coming back to the yesterday’s fiasco, I was reading the novel, ‘Fifty Shades of Grey’ (Please I DO NOT recommend this book, it’s a total bull-shit) when I posted this on both of the social networking sites. After I completed a chapter; I just checked my notifications on both of the sites and realized I had called for a lot of trouble. Boys/Men, who are, of course my friends, attacked me from all sides. They were outraged, and the enthusiasm and anger with which they retorted was alarming. I tried explaining myself, but nobody was ready to eye it from my angle, in fact they were so offended, that they called me ‘lame’, ‘naive’, ‘stupid’, ‘immature’, and as, ‘what is wrong with you?’. I too got furious in no time (yes I’m short tempered. It doesn’t take much effort to get me mad, however, I also, cool down fast). The situation was like, I was saying, ‘the glass is half full’ and they were saying, ‘the glass is made up of porcelain’, yes, both were right.
None of us, were ready to see the coin from both the sides; we stuck to our respective sides. I was fuming with rage; I logged off from both the social networking sites, and got back to, ‘Fifty Shades of Grey’. However, reading that tripe ignited me more. I kept the book aside and tried sleeping off the fury, but I could not, nonetheless I had calmed by then. In that composure, I introspected, and realized it was no one’s fault. Concluded that, indeed, I did act a little immature by posting that; but my intention, what I had meant, was not deciphered the way I had intended it to. Hence, ‘THE CLARIFICATION’. I’m a restless soul, I can’t rest until I’m understood, maybe that’s another sign of my immatureness, but that’s the way I am. I don’t mind if people don’t agree with my perspective, but I do mind if my perspective is interpreted wrongly. So my dear boys/men friends this is what I had meant……
• First, and foremost, I said ‘trust’ not ‘blame’. There’s a huge difference between the two, I’m sure you know that well. I’m not blaming the entire male community, for what happened to that girl, I’m certainly not!
• My, ‘We won’t be able to trust you henceforth’ was not directed at you my friends whom I know well; I actually intended to address it to the other members of your tribe that I do not know well, like the cabbies, bus-drivers, vendors, salesmen, or any random men on the road. However, some of you my friends, got offended and argued that, I’m contradicting myself, that ‘NOT TRUSTING’ is equivalent to ‘BLAMING’. Now, how the hell on earth, my friends? Anyway, I’ll try explaining myself with an example, the trust that we earlier had on the cabbies/bus drivers (wasn’t that girl raped by a bus driver?) to drive us safely to our destination, will be questioned by our conscience. We, will suspect, yes we will, though he maybe a saint (by the way, have you’ll heard this quote, ‘looks can be deceptive’?); and would carry a pepper spray with us every time.
• Then some of you’ll asked me, as to what about the male members of my family, and my close male friends, would I say the aforementioned to them, too. No my dear friends, I will not! As I said earlier, this was not directed at you or my family. However, your this argument forced me to think in a direction I had over looked (Yes I tend to over-think, I’m a girl after-all).
• I would first like you to watch the video that a male friend of mine had sent it to me,
Therefore, this is what I had meant! The truth is my friends; the reason why I said ‘we won’t be able to trust henceforth’ is because, my tribe is weak. Yes, you read that right! Though my egoist side would never succumb to believing in that; but at the end of the day, the truth is we are feeble, of course physically, and that has been proved time and again. Hence, the ‘NOT TRUSTING’ comes in. You, all my male friends, I’m sure like us, even you were infuriated, and abhorred, what happened to that girl; but the thing is you could not relate to her agony. We could, and so we are scared, scared at the thought of, us being there, in her position. We are not blaming you, we are just terrified, and that’s what makes us suspect. Yes, I’m a feminist, but not a female chauvinist, and certainly not a gay. I don’t hate men, I love men. I love my dad, I love my male cousins, I will love my future boyfriend/husband, and my future son(s) too, so please do not have a doubt about that. I’m right now just a petrified being. Nevertheless, all my dear male friends, I trust you, trust you dearly, one hundred percent. However, do not get offended when any of my sisters, who does not know you; hesitates a little, before putting faith in you. Just remember, she is just scared! That’s all from my side, you are allowed to disagree with me; but this is my, and my tribe’s perspective, and I had to make you’ll see it!